PipeChat Digest #1844 - Tuesday, February 27, 2001
 
To Rebekah:  Re: Need advice
  by "Glenda" <gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com>
Re: Need advice
  by "Bonnie Beth Derby" <orge@dreamscape.com>
RE: salaries
  by "Bob Scarborough" <desertbob@rglobal.net>
Re: salaries
  by <Cremona502@cs.com>
Re: Need advice
  by <Cremona502@cs.com>
RE: Need advice
  by "randy terry" <randyterryus@yahoo.com>
Re: To Rebekah:  Re: Need advice
  by <Cremona502@cs.com>
Re: To Rebekah:  Re: Need advice
  by <Cremona502@cs.com>
Re: To Rebekah:  Re: Need advice
  by <Innkawgneeto@cs.com>
please forgive some bitter personal recollections
  by <quilisma@socal.rr.com>
 

(back) Subject: To Rebekah: Re: Need advice From: "Glenda" <gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com> Date: Mon, 26 Feb 2001 21:56:35 -0600   This is a multi-part message in MIME format.   ------=3D_NextPart_000_0004_01C0A03E.FCC29140 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable   I really hated to send this to the whole list, but couldn't get my =3D system to recognize your e-mail address and send it directly. I =3D apologize to you and to the list. =3D20 I know it hurts that your family will not be at your recital, and =3D there's no way to avoid that pain. Nothing we could say will prevent =3D the hurt - you want so badly for those you love to share the big =3D moments. =3D20 =3D20 But let me ask you - why are you going to college? Why are you getting = =3D this degree? Why are you pursuing music? Is it for your parents, or =3D for yourself? Here is the crux of the matter. In the end you have to =3D live with yourself and like and appreciate yourself standing alone. =3D More importantly, you have to answer the call. Is this it?   I know you will get a plethora of people's stories trying to make you =3D feel better. That doesn't always work, but what it's worth here's mine. = =3D My father died never having heard me play the organ. He was my =3D earliest musical inspiration, and I am sorry I did not get to play for =3D him. My mother is alive and has never heard me play organ - I don't =3D think her health is such that she could sit through a recital. None of = =3D my family attends the recitals, other than my husband, who is my biggest = =3D critic. In order to relax and play I shove out of my mind that he is =3D even there. My own organ teacher makes me so nervous that I have only =3D allowed him to attend one.   Rebekah, sometimes it is best to play for a room of complete strangers. = =3D Remember Christ said that a prophet is not recognized in his own =3D country/home town. Strangers many times don't carry any baggage or =3D extreme expectations. They appreciate you at face value. The biggest =3D thrill for me is to play well for strangers who are lay =3D people/nonmusicians, and who come to appreciate and enjoy organ music =3D because perhaps I introduced them to it. My favorite performances are =3D not always the best, most flawless ones, but the ones where I feel the =3D joy and excitement flowing from the performer. If you have that fire in = =3D your belly, go for it. If it's your dream, make it so. And don't worry = =3D about your family's approval - God has a way of leading us or pushing us = =3D where we need to be, and I don't think He stopped to ask our family's =3D permission.   I doubt this was much help, but my heart goes out to you. Keep plugging = =3D on.   Gotta go - my cats have revoked my e-mail privileges. Gotta go to bed.   Glenda Sutton   ------=3D_NextPart_000_0004_01C0A03E.FCC29140 Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable   <!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META content=3D3D"text/html; charset=3D3Diso-8859-1" =3D http-equiv=3D3DContent-Type> <META content=3D3D"MSHTML 5.00.2919.6307" name=3D3DGENERATOR> <STYLE></STYLE> </HEAD> <BODY bgColor=3D3D#ffffff> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>I really hated to send this to the = =3D whole&nbsp;list,=3D20 but couldn't get my system to recognize your e-mail address and send = it=3D20 directly.&nbsp; I apologize to you and to the list.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>I know it hurts that your family will = =3D not be at=3D20 your recital, and there's no way to avoid that pain.&nbsp; Nothing we =3D could say=3D20 will prevent the hurt - you want so badly for those you love to share =3D the big=3D20 moments.&nbsp; </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>But let me ask you - why are you = going =3D to=3D20 college?&nbsp; Why are you getting this degree?&nbsp; Why are you =3D pursuing=3D20 music?&nbsp; Is it for your parents, or for yourself?&nbsp; Here is the = =3D crux of=3D20 the matter.&nbsp; In the end you have to live with yourself and like and = =3D   appreciate yourself standing alone.&nbsp; More importantly,&nbsp;you =3D have to=3D20 answer the call.&nbsp; Is this it?</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>I know you will get a plethora of =3D people's stories=3D20 trying to make you feel better.&nbsp; That doesn't always work, but what = =3D it's=3D20 worth here's mine.&nbsp; My father died never having heard me play = the=3D20 organ.&nbsp; He was my earliest musical inspiration, and I am sorry I =3D did not=3D20 get to play for him.&nbsp; My mother is alive and has never heard me =3D play organ=3D20 - I don't think her health is such&nbsp;that she could sit through a=3D20 recital.&nbsp; None of my family attends the recitals, other =3D than&nbsp;my=3D20 husband, who is my biggest critic.&nbsp; In order to relax and =3D play&nbsp;I shove=3D20 out of my mind that he is even there.&nbsp; My own organ teacher makes =3D me so=3D20 nervous that I have only allowed him to attend one.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Rebekah, sometimes it is best to play = =3D for a room of=3D20 complete strangers.&nbsp; Remember Christ said that a prophet is not =3D recognized=3D20 in his own country/home town.&nbsp; Strangers many times don't carry any = =3D baggage=3D20 or extreme expectations.&nbsp; They appreciate you at face value.&nbsp; = =3D The=3D20 biggest thrill for me is to play well for strangers who are lay=3D20 people/nonmusicians, and who come to appreciate and enjoy organ music =3D because=3D20 perhaps I introduced them to it.&nbsp; My favorite performances are not = =3D always=3D20 the best, most flawless ones, but the ones where I feel the joy and =3D excitement=3D20 flowing from the performer.&nbsp; If you have that fire in your belly, =3D go for=3D20 it.&nbsp; If it's your dream, make it so.&nbsp; And don't worry about =3D your=3D20 family's approval - God has a way of leading us or pushing us where we =3D need to=3D20 be, and I don't think He stopped to ask our family's =3D permission.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>I doubt this was much help, but my = =3D heart goes out=3D20 to you.&nbsp; Keep plugging on.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Gotta go - my cats have revoked my = =3D e-mail=3D20 privileges.&nbsp; Gotta go to bed.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Glenda =3D Sutton</FONT></DIV></BODY></HTML>   ------=3D_NextPart_000_0004_01C0A03E.FCC29140--    
(back) Subject: Re: Need advice From: "Bonnie Beth Derby" <orge@dreamscape.com> Date: Mon, 26 Feb 2001 23:06:58 -0500   This is a multi-part message in MIME format.   ------=3D_NextPart_000_0013_01C0A048.D1C4D0C0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable   Hi Rebekah,   That hurts!!! My father passed away a month before my Master's recital = =3D but I knew that he was there in Spirit. One of my recital compositions = =3D was "Trois Dance" of Jehan Alain and the feeling I had for those three =3D dances at that time, especially the second one..."Sorrows", could never = =3D be dublicated again. That was definitely for him. =3D20   Play for those who WILL be there. Your audience will support you and =3D will appreciate your musicianship and all the work that you have put =3D into your senior recital. If your mom cannot change her plans for her =3D daughter's senior recital - that's HER loss, not yours. =3D20   I'll be there!!! Let's have a PipeChat reunion at Rebekah's Recital!! = =3D     Best regards,   Bonnie Beth =3D20   Bonnie Beth Derby, B.Mus., M.Mus. Producer & Host ``Orgelwerke'' & ``Choral Traditions'' WCNY-FM, 91.3; Syracuse; WUNY-FM, 89.5, Utica; WJNY-FM, 90.9, = Watertown=3D20 Organist & Director of Music, St. James Roman Catholic Church, Syracuse = =3D [1988 Odell/Kerner & Merchant 33-rank tracker organ] orge@dreamscape.com ----- Original Message -----=3D20 From: Rebekah Ingram=3D20 To: PipeChat=3D20 Sent: Monday, February 26, 2001 8:50 PM Subject: Need advice     Hi everyone,   I have something that's been weighing on my mind for about 3 weeks, =3D and I would like some other opinions.   I scheduled my recital back in November for April 21st at 5pm. As many = =3D of you know, my mother's an organist as well, so I tried to accommodate = =3D her schedule in picking the date.=3D20   I talked to my mother about three weeks ago, and reminded her (a) I =3D -have- a senior recital and (b) the exact date and time. She looked at =3D her calendar and told me that she and my sister were going on vacation =3D and wouldn't be able to make it.   I'm kind of upset by this, and I'm wondering what other reactions are. = =3D She -knew- for all four years that I have to have a senior recital in =3D order to graduate. I suppose I should have reminded her earlier, but my = =3D last recital was the same time last year. A close friend of mine =3D commented that it seemed to her to be a horrible thing to do, saying =3D that she hoped that at least her closest family members would come for =3D that occasion. My father usually has to work on weekends, and he =3D wouldn't really understand it as well as my mother anyway...   I know I'm peeved (well, more upset than peeved), but I don't know =3D whether or not I have a right to be.=3D20   Guess you all will have to show up and cheer me up. :-( Feel free to =3D respond privately.   -Rebekah     ------=3D_NextPart_000_0013_01C0A048.D1C4D0C0 Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable   <!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"> <HTML><HEAD> <META content=3D3D"text/html; charset=3D3Diso-8859-1" =3D http-equiv=3D3DContent-Type> <META content=3D3D"MSHTML 5.00.2314.1000" name=3D3DGENERATOR> <STYLE></STYLE> </HEAD> <BODY bgColor=3D3D#ffffff> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Hi Rebekah,</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>That hurts!!!&nbsp; My father passed = =3D away a=3D20 month&nbsp;before my Master's recital but I knew that he was there in=3D20 Spirit.&nbsp; One of my recital compositions&nbsp;was "Trois Dance" of =3D Jehan=3D20 Alain and the feeling I had for those three dances at that time,=3D20 especially&nbsp;the second one..."Sorrows", could never be dublicated=3D20 again.&nbsp; That was definitely for him.&nbsp;&nbsp;</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Play for those who WILL be = there.&nbsp; =3D Your=3D20 audience will support you and&nbsp;will appreciate your musicianship and = =3D all the=3D20 work that you have put into&nbsp;your senior recital.&nbsp; If your=3D20 mom&nbsp;cannot change her plans for her daughter's senior recital -=3D20 that's&nbsp;HER loss, not yours.&nbsp; &nbsp;</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>I'll be there!!!&nbsp; Let's have a = =3D PipeChat=3D20 reunion at Rebekah's Recital!! &nbsp; </FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Best regards,</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2></FONT>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT face=3D3DArial size=3D3D2>Bonnie Beth&nbsp; </FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV>Bonnie Beth Derby, B.Mus., M.Mus.<BR>Producer &amp; Host =3D ``Orgelwerke''=3D20 &amp; ``Choral Traditions''<BR>WCNY-FM, 91.3; Syracuse; WUNY-FM, 89.5, =3D Utica;=3D20 WJNY-FM, 90.9, Watertown <BR>Organist &amp; Director of Music, St. James = =3D Roman=3D20 Catholic Church, Syracuse [1988 Odell/Kerner &amp; Merchant 33-rank =3D tracker=3D20 organ]<BR><A =3D href=3D3D"mailto:orge@dreamscape.com">orge@dreamscape.com</A></DIV> <BLOCKQUOTE=3D20 style=3D3D"BORDER-LEFT: #000000 2px solid; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-RIGHT: = =3D 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"> <DIV style=3D3D"FONT: 10pt arial">----- Original Message ----- </DIV> <DIV=3D20 style=3D3D"BACKGROUND: #e4e4e4; FONT: 10pt arial; font-color: =3D black"><B>From:</B>=3D20 <A href=3D3D"mailto:rringram@syr.edu" title=3D3Drringram@syr.edu>Rebekah = =3D Ingram</A>=3D20 </DIV> <DIV style=3D3D"FONT: 10pt arial"><B>To:</B> <A=3D20 href=3D3D"mailto:pipechat@pipechat.org" =3D title=3D3Dpipechat@pipechat.org>PipeChat</A>=3D20 </DIV> <DIV style=3D3D"FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Sent:</B> Monday, February 26, 2001 = =3D 8:50=3D20 PM</DIV> <DIV style=3D3D"FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Subject:</B> Need advice</DIV> <DIV><BR></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>Hi everyone,</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>I have something that's been =3D weighing on my=3D20 mind for about 3 weeks, and I would like some other =3D opinions.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>I scheduled my recital back in = =3D November for=3D20 April 21st at 5pm. As many of you know, my mother's an organist as =3D well, so I=3D20 tried to accommodate her schedule in picking the date. </FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>I talked to my mother about = three =3D weeks ago,=3D20 and reminded her (a) I -have- a senior recital and (b) the exact date = =3D and=3D20 time. She looked at her calendar and told me that she and my sister =3D were going=3D20 on vacation and wouldn't be able to make it.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>I'm kind of upset by this, and = I'm =3D wondering=3D20 what other reactions are. She -knew- for all four years that I have to = =3D have a=3D20 senior recital in order to graduate. I suppose I should have reminded = =3D her=3D20 earlier, but my last recital was the same time last year. A close =3D friend of=3D20 mine commented that it seemed to her to be a horrible thing to do, =3D saying that=3D20 she hoped that at least her closest family members would come for that = =3D   occasion. My father usually has to work on weekends, and he wouldn't =3D really=3D20 understand it as well as my mother anyway...</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>I know I'm peeved (well, more = =3D upset than=3D20 peeved), but I don't know whether or not I have a right to be. =3D </FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>Guess you all will have to show = up =3D and cheer=3D20 me up. :-( Feel free to respond privately.</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV> <DIV><FONT color=3D3D#000000 size=3D3D2>-Rebekah</FONT></DIV> <DIV>&nbsp;</DIV></BLOCKQUOTE></BODY></HTML>   ------=3D_NextPart_000_0013_01C0A048.D1C4D0C0--    
(back) Subject: RE: salaries From: "Bob Scarborough" <desertbob@rglobal.net> Date: Mon, 26 Feb 2001 20:09:50 -0800   At 08:36 PM 2/24/2001 -0500, you wrote: >When I told him how much money I thought the job would require, >he said, "why that's more than we pay the pastor!"<snip>   Tell 'em you'll take the same salary as the "pastor", PLUS all the tax breaks and perks...then grab it. Those "men of the cloth" usually don't = do too shabby for themselves once you factor in all the "grease"!   DeserTBoB    
(back) Subject: Re: salaries From: <Cremona502@cs.com> Date: Tue, 27 Feb 2001 01:02:32 EST     --part1_b4.11dfca0b.27cc9cf8_boundary Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   In a message dated 2/27/01 1:45:52 AM !!!First Boot!!!, = organdok@safari.net writes:     > I told him that indeed it wasn't even on the low side > but some of my friends make that kind of money as part-time church > musicians. When I told him how much money I thought the job would = require, > he said, "why that's more than we pay the pastor   But did you send him a press photo to show him how cute you are???   THey like to know what they're paying for... heeheehee   Bruce ~ Cremona502@cs.com with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" Visit Howling Acres at http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/   --part1_b4.11dfca0b.27cc9cf8_boundary Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   <HTML><FONT FACE=3Darial,helvetica><FONT SIZE=3D2>In a message dated = 2/27/01 1:45:52 AM !!!First Boot!!!, organdok@safari.net <BR>writes: <BR> <BR> <BR><BLOCKQUOTE TYPE=3DCITE style=3D"BORDER-LEFT: #0000ff 2px solid; = MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px">I told him that = indeed it wasn't even on the low side <BR>but some of my friends make that kind of money as part-time church <BR>musicians. When I told him how much money I thought the job would = require, <BR>he said, "why that's more than we pay the pastor</FONT><FONT = COLOR=3D"#000000" SIZE=3D3 FAMILY=3D"SANSSERIF" FACE=3D"Arial" = LANG=3D"0"></BLOCKQUOTE> <BR></FONT><FONT COLOR=3D"#000000" SIZE=3D2 FAMILY=3D"SANSSERIF" = FACE=3D"Arial" LANG=3D"0"> <BR>But did you send him a press photo to show him how cute you are??? <BR> <BR>THey like to know what they're paying for... heeheehee <BR> <BR>Bruce &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;~ &nbsp;Cremona502@cs.com &nbsp; <BR>with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" <BR>Visit Howling Acres at = &nbsp;&nbsp;http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/</FONT></HTML>   --part1_b4.11dfca0b.27cc9cf8_boundary--  
(back) Subject: Re: Need advice From: <Cremona502@cs.com> Date: Tue, 27 Feb 2001 01:07:09 EST     --part1_d4.2df26d8.27cc9e0d_boundary Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   In a message dated 2/27/01 2:02:15 AM !!!First Boot!!!, rringram@syr.edu writes:     > I talked to my mother about three weeks ago, and reminded her (a) I = -have- a > senior recital and (b) the exact date and time. She looked at her = calendar > and told me that she and my sister were going on vacation and wouldn't = be > able to make it. > >   Welcome to the adult world, Rebekah. My advice is don't worry about it. =   You will have friends and other admirers there to cheer you on. And I wouldn't mention it again. Families can sometimes find it quite easy to take each other for granted. You don't need the aggravation for a recital =   day. My rule is: don't expect anyone to show up, and be grateful for those who do. And all I need is one person for an audience. Bruce ~ Cremona502@cs.com with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" Visit Howling Acres at http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/   --part1_d4.2df26d8.27cc9e0d_boundary Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   <HTML><FONT FACE=3Darial,helvetica><FONT SIZE=3D2>In a message dated = 2/27/01 2:02:15 AM !!!First Boot!!!, rringram@syr.edu <BR>writes: <BR> <BR> <BR><BLOCKQUOTE TYPE=3DCITE style=3D"BORDER-LEFT: #0000ff 2px solid; = MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px">I talked to my = mother about three weeks ago, and reminded her (a) I -have- a <BR>senior recital and (b) the exact date and time. She looked at her = calendar <BR>and told me that she and my sister were going on vacation and wouldn't = be <BR>able to make it. <BR> <BR></BLOCKQUOTE> <BR> <BR>Welcome to the adult world, Rebekah. &nbsp;&nbsp;My advice is don't = worry about it. &nbsp; <BR>You will have friends and other admirers there to cheer you on. = &nbsp;&nbsp;And I <BR>wouldn't mention it again. &nbsp;&nbsp;Families can sometimes find it = quite easy to <BR>take each other for granted. &nbsp;You don't need the aggravation for = a recital <BR>day. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;My rule is: &nbsp;don't expect anyone to = show up, and be grateful for <BR>those who do. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And all I need is one person for an = audience. &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <BR>Bruce &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;~ &nbsp;Cremona502@cs.com &nbsp; <BR>with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" <BR>Visit Howling Acres at = &nbsp;&nbsp;http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/</FONT></HTML>   --part1_d4.2df26d8.27cc9e0d_boundary--  
(back) Subject: RE: Need advice From: "randy terry" <randyterryus@yahoo.com> Date: Mon, 26 Feb 2001 22:08:05 -0800 (PST)   --- Randy Terry <randyterry@laumc.org> wrote: > It took years before my parents had any conception of what my craft = meant to > me. They never thought too much of it till I moved across the country. > <sigh>   Rebekah,   I guess this is not applicable as your Mom is an organist, too, so she = ought to understand. But, my parents went to my university recitals and threw a = fabulous party after my senior recital - but they felt their obligations were met = after that and rarely came out when I got busy in my church jobs, the AGO, etc. = At my first church job I organized a pretty big series of concerts up to international artists, and they were not there. To me these were the real triumphs. It hurt at first that they were not interested.   But as I grew older I decided to accept them as they had accepted me and = my partner of 11 years now - Even though we live 3000 miles away, at = Christmas Steve is just as much family as my brother's wife. I don't give a hoot = about my mothers prized Persian cats, or my dad's hunting or country club, so it works both ways when my mother starts explaining the genetic color = patterns or coat possible with different pairings of cats. Maybe that is similar to = their lack of most of what I do.   Bottom line is we are a family and that is better than anything else. = Talk to her! It helps!         =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D Randy Terry Minister of Music, Organist & Choirmaster The Episcopal Church of St. Peter Redwood City, California   __________________________________________________ Do You Yahoo!? Get email at your own domain with Yahoo! Mail. http://personal.mail.yahoo.com/  
(back) Subject: Re: To Rebekah: Re: Need advice From: <Cremona502@cs.com> Date: Tue, 27 Feb 2001 01:35:22 EST     --part1_b2.11c82714.27cca4aa_boundary Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   In a message dated 2/27/01 4:00:33 AM !!!First Boot!!!, gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com writes:     > I really hated to send this to the whole list, but couldn't get my = system to > recognize your e-mail address and send it directly. I apologize to you = and > to the list. > > I know it hurts that your family will not be at your recital, and = there's > no way to avoid that pain. Nothing we could say will prevent the hurt - =   > you want so badly for those you love to share the big moments. > >   Well put, Glenda. I'm glad you sent this to the whole list. There are = alot of people who will need to hear/read it, but won't have the courage to express their pain. Ya dunne gudde!   Cheers.   Scritchies to the kittie and the beags!   Bruce ~ Cremona502@cs.com with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" Visit Howling Acres at http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/   --part1_b2.11c82714.27cca4aa_boundary Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   <HTML><FONT FACE=3Darial,helvetica><FONT SIZE=3D2>In a message dated = 2/27/01 4:00:33 AM !!!First Boot!!!, <BR>gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com writes: <BR> <BR> <BR><BLOCKQUOTE TYPE=3DCITE style=3D"BORDER-LEFT: #0000ff 2px solid; = MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px">I really hated to = send this to the whole list, but couldn't get my system to <BR>recognize your e-mail address and send it directly. &nbsp;I apologize = to you and <BR>to the list. <BR> <BR>I know it hurts that your family will not be at your recital, and = there's <BR>no way to avoid that pain. &nbsp;Nothing we could say will prevent the = hurt - <BR>you want so badly for those you love to share the big moments. &nbsp; <BR> <BR></BLOCKQUOTE> <BR> <BR>Well put, Glenda. &nbsp;&nbsp;I'm glad you sent this to the whole = list. &nbsp;There are alot <BR>of people who will need to hear/read it, but won't have the courage to =   <BR>express their pain. &nbsp;Ya dunne gudde! &nbsp; <BR> <BR>Cheers. <BR> <BR>Scritchies to the kittie and the beags! <BR> <BR>Bruce &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;~ &nbsp;Cremona502@cs.com &nbsp; <BR>with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" <BR>Visit Howling Acres at = &nbsp;&nbsp;http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/</FONT></HTML>   --part1_b2.11c82714.27cca4aa_boundary--  
(back) Subject: Re: To Rebekah: Re: Need advice From: <Cremona502@cs.com> Date: Tue, 27 Feb 2001 01:35:41 EST     --part1_3d.7f86ef5.27cca4bd_boundary Content-Type: text/plain; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   In a message dated 2/27/01 4:00:33 AM !!!First Boot!!!, gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com writes:     > I really hated to send this to the whole list, but couldn't get my = system to > recognize your e-mail address and send it directly. I apologize to you = and > to the list. > > I know it hurts that your family will not be at your recital, and = there's > no way to avoid that pain. Nothing we could say will prevent the hurt - =   > you want so badly for those you love to share the big moments. > >     Bruce ~ Cremona502@cs.com with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" Visit Howling Acres at http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/   --part1_3d.7f86ef5.27cca4bd_boundary Content-Type: text/html; charset=3D"US-ASCII" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit   <HTML><FONT FACE=3Darial,helvetica><FONT SIZE=3D2>In a message dated = 2/27/01 4:00:33 AM !!!First Boot!!!, <BR>gksjd85@access.aic-fl.com writes: <BR> <BR> <BR><BLOCKQUOTE TYPE=3DCITE style=3D"BORDER-LEFT: #0000ff 2px solid; = MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px">I really hated to = send this to the whole list, but couldn't get my system to <BR>recognize your e-mail address and send it directly. &nbsp;I apologize = to you and <BR>to the list. <BR> <BR>I know it hurts that your family will not be at your recital, and = there's <BR>no way to avoid that pain. &nbsp;Nothing we could say will prevent the = hurt - <BR>you want so badly for those you love to share the big moments. &nbsp; <BR> <BR></BLOCKQUOTE> <BR> <BR> <BR>Bruce &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;~ &nbsp;Cremona502@cs.com &nbsp; <BR>with the Baskerbeagles in the Beagle's Nest ~ ""Haruffaroo, Bohawow!" <BR>Visit Howling Acres at = &nbsp;&nbsp;http://members.tripod.com/Brucon502/</FONT></HTML>   --part1_3d.7f86ef5.27cca4bd_boundary--  
(back) Subject: Re: To Rebekah: Re: Need advice From: <Innkawgneeto@cs.com> Date: Tue, 27 Feb 2001 01:39:55 EST   Could Rebekah's mother be planning a surprise, perhaps? Maybe she will = show up at the recital after all.   My parents attended my junior recital so they could then attend my = graduation the next year.   Just throwing in my 2 pennies worth.   Neil  
(back) Subject: please forgive some bitter personal recollections From: <quilisma@socal.rr.com> Date: Mon, 26 Feb 2001 22:44:43 -0800   My mother came to my Senior Recital. I wish she hadn't. She sat silent and disapproving through the whole program, and the reception that followed.   Later, back at the hotel, she yelled at me for two hours because I'd invited a "nigra" to the reception (one of my closest friends and my countertenor soloist at Old St. Mary's).   Then she told me she'd given my late father's ring (my only remembrance of him) to my sister ... I wasn't "worthy" of it.   That Sunday being Christ the King, she repeated her performance at Old St. Mary's ... I was conducting the Charpentier Mass in g minor with orchestra. She remained unimpressed. There was another reception for the choir, the orchestra and me after Mass ... she refused to come, and sat in the car.   She didn't come to my ordination to the priesthood. Nor did she ever see me celebrate Mass.   When my sister asked me if I was going to play the organ for her funeral, I said, "Yes. She wouldn't come to hear me play when she was alive; she doesn't have a CHOICE this time." So I sat dry-eyed in the organ loft and played the old gospel hymns of my childhood on the organ, my organ, that she'd given to the church when I graduated from high school. It was YEARS before I could play those hymns again.   Now I have a large and loving extended family of my own choosing.   Bud