PipeChat Digest #2932 - Sunday, June 23, 2002
Onwards, down and outwards
  by <cmys13085@blueyonder.co.uk>

(back) Subject: Onwards, down and outwards From: <cmys13085@blueyonder.co.uk> Date: Sun, 23 Jun 2002 10:06:35 +0100   Hello,     Quite how a discussion about digital organs turned into a discussion = about hymns, is beyond my ken. However, it reminds me of another story = (Not aNOTHER one!) concerning events surrounding the appointment of a = new vicar at a very high Anglican church here in Yorkshire, UK.   The Bishop, eager to attract new blood and engage with "young people", = brought pressure to bear. In a church which was traditionally all = "smells and bells" and every act of worship was yet another "Missa = Incomprehensibulis", the announcement of the Bishop's intentions did not = go down too well. In fact, in many countries, such communal anger would = have seen him stoned to death.   With the dulcet protests of "tsk tsk" ringing in his ears, the Bishop = inducted the new man; a former Captain in the Church Army.   Things moved quickly, as icons such as the "Statue of the Virgin" and = the "Stations of the Cross" were removed and more "popular" hymns placed = on the choir notice board in time for practise.   The Organist, dear old Donald, a man of extreme anglo-catholic leanings, = could take no more when the Vicar suggested that the Processional Cross = should only be used at special services.   Not normally a man given to violent or loud protest, Donald hatched a = plot for the Confirmation Service at which the Bishop would be present. = Training his choir meticulously, as he always did, he had the words of = the hymn altered. The choir were not informed of the changes beforehand.   The Confirmation service began with "Onward Christian soldiers"....never = sung before in the history of this particular church and therefore new = to the choristers. The procession started and the choir "marched" into = church with military precision singing:-   "Onward Christian Soldiers, marching as to war: with the Cross of Jesus, = nailed behind the door!"   After the service, Donald removed his surplice, threw it on the floor = and departed forever.   Regards,   Colin Mitchell UK